Ironic Times

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PAGE THREE – APRIL 4 - 10, 2011
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MISCELLANEOUS
“Spider-Man” Ascends World's Tallest Building
Yet another delay for troubled musical.
Study: Kids Who Attend Church Regularly More Prone to Adult Obesity
Concludes: chubbiness is next to Godliness.
 
TECHNOLOGY
Wireless Companies Track Your
Every Move

Hand over data to government if you change providers.
For $1000, New Website Lets
Celebrities Refute Lies Said
About Them

For $2000, they can spread new ones.
 
FEATURE
We're in Libya:
A )because we want to prevent a humanitarian disaster.
B )because we have this complex, nuanced military intervention checklist.
C )because Ivory Coast, Sudan, Bahrain and Yemen are too far away.
D )because Libya supplies 2% of our oil.
Hint: pull over and think about it.
 
NEW PRODUCTS
$8 Million iPad Debuts
Aimed at billionaires who don't miss Adobe's Flash.

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