Ironic Times

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PAGE TWO – JULY 15 - 21, 2013
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PEOPLE
9/11 Mastermind Khalid Sheikh Mohammed Designs Vacuum Cleaner
Hoping for job with Hoover when he gets out.
 
PUBLISHING
OED Adds “Tweet,” “Crowdsourcing,” “E-Reader”
Holding off on for now.
 
BUSINESS
80-Year-Old Ban on Hedge Fund Advertising Lifted
Giving public plenty of time to buy in before next Wall Street collapse.
  Studies Link Fracking to Earthquakes
Energy industry argues otherwise, claims earthquakes cause them to frack.
HEALTH / MEDICINE
Study: U.S. Has “Mediocre” Health Care Compared to Other Wealthy Countries
But we clean their clocks when it comes to competitive eating.
Study: 70% of Americans on Prescription Drugs
Among other parallels to Brave New World.
Survey: 1 in 5 18 to 35-Year-Olds Have Used Smartphones During Sex
Based on late-night phone survey.
 
SCIENCE
Siberia: Scientists Hope to Clone Recently Uncovered Woolly Mammoth
Open tourist attraction near Ft. Lauderdale.
 
CONSUMER NEWS
Hostess Says New Twinkies
Will Have an Extended Shelf
Life of 45 Days

And a half-life of 10,000 years.

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