Ironic Times

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PAGE THREE – OCTOBER 21 - 27, 2013
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MISCELLANEOUS
House Stenographer Starts Ranting About Jesus, Constitution, Freemasons, Removed From Chamber, Taken for Tests
Later, House Republican starts ranting about Jesus, Constitution, Freemasons.
Physics Nobel Prize-Winner Peter Higgs Doesn't Own Computer or Cell Phone
Was informed of his win by owl.
 
LIFESTYLE
Trendy Brooklyn Restaurant Promotes Silent Dining, Allows No Talking
Perfect for first dates, married couples.
 
KIDZ KORNER
Vocabulary Builders
anachronism n., a concept that has become obsolete, like “the full faith and credit of the United States.”
FEATURE
After a drug cartel boss was killed by gunmen dressed as clowns at a Baja, California children's party, what action was taken by the Mexican government?
A )Stern warning issued to clowns.
B )Stern warning issued to children.
C )Stern warning issued to both clowns and children.
D )Movie rights for horror flick about killer clowns at children's party nailed down.
Hint: Pemex can't fund Mexican government forever.
 
ODDS 'N' ENDS
37 House Republicans Ascend to Heaven
Without their clothes.

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