Ironic Times

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PAGE TWO – MAY 26 - JUN 1, 2014
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PEOPLE
Kim Kardashian, Kanye West Wed in Florence, Italy
Following the ceremony, the couple rushed off to make a sex tape.
 
BUSINESS
Disney Hikes Entry Fee to Ease Crowding at Disneyland
Putting “happiest place on earth” out of reach for another 30 million kids.
AT&T to Buy DirecTV for $48 Billion
It's the perfect synergy of massive layoffs and world domination.
Report: Cereal Prices to Soar Due to Climate Change
A cap-and-trade on sugar could put Frosted Flakes beyond reach for average consumer.
 
CONSUMER NEWS
Ohio: First Edible Insect
Farm Opens in U.S.

Think of it this way: they're gluten-free.
HEALTH / MEDICINE
E-Cigarettes Debut With Thin
Mint, Tootsie Roll Flavors

Makers say they can help 8-year-olds quit smoking.
New Study: No Health Benefit to Drinking Red Wine
But it's too late now.
 
Krispy Kreme Triple Cheeseburger Introduced
After numerous last meal requests on death row.
 
SCIENCE
Scientists Design a Collider That Turns Light Into Matter
Hook it up to a 3-D printer and you can be the first God in your neighborhood.
First Fresh Vegetables Grown in Space
They'll be brought back to Earth, where they'll be over-cooked, served, then thrown out.

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