Ironic Times

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PAGE TWO – FEBRUARY 9 - 15, 2015
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ART
Recently Discovered Bronze Sculptures Possibly by Michelangelo
Or a 3D printer.
 
ENTERTAINMENT
Next Super Bowl to Be All
Commercials, With 30-Second
Spots of Game Highlights

During which viewers can go to the bathroom.
 
BUSINESS
Wells Fargo Bank Tracks Employees' “Happy-To- Grumpy” Ratios
Guess who is fired.
Mattelís CEO Resigns as Companyís Sales Slide
Interim CEO moves to boost Barbie sales by adding body piercing, tattoos.
SCIENCE
Study: Cockroaches Have Personalities
And a dry sense of humor.
Astronomers Forced to Backtrack on Recent Discovery of Cosmic Inflation, Finding at Least 40% of Signal Was Dust from Keck Array Telescope
The janitorís been fired.
 
Study: Chimps Learn New Language When They Change Locale
Unlike humans.
 
HEALTH / MEDICINE
Study: Organ Donation Has
Added 2,270,859 Years to
Americans' Lives Since 1987

So check that box on your driver's license, you never know when a drunk driver will make you a donor candidate.
Study: Conservatives Die
Sooner Than Liberals

Usually from gout.

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