Ironic Times

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PAGE THREE – OCTOBER 7 - 13, 2019
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TECHNOLOGY
Russian Company Starts Mass Production of Humanoid Robots That Can Look Like You
Donald Trump has ordered five million that look like him.
Study: British Employees Sabotaging Workplace Robots Over Fears They Will Replace Them
Robots retaliate, hack into employees' records, post embarrassing pictures online.
 
MISCELLANEOUS
Study: 6 In 10 Millennials
“Never” Relax Because of
Constant Urge to Check Phone

Six in ten baby boomers “never” relax because of constant urge to pee.
 
ELECTION 2020
In Cybersecurity Test, Hackers
Break Into Every Type of Voting Machine
To make sure they can vote for Trump.
FEATURE
How does the U.S. gun homicide rate compare to other high-income nations?
A )About the same.
B )A little higher.
C )Three times higher.
D )Ten times higher.
D )Twenty-five times higher.
Hint: You're lucky to be alive, quite frankly.
 
SPORTS
California Law Will Allow College Athletes to Hire Agents, Sign Endorsement Deals
As long as they maintain a D+ average.
 
ODDS 'N' ENDS
Brewer Teams With Hershey's to Create Chocolate Beer
Kids love it with their flavored e-cigarettes.

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