| POWELL TO MIDEAST:
"MAKE PEACE OR EAT A
KNUCKLE SANDWICH" |
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| WORLD NEWS |
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Shuttle Mistakenly Docks With
Wrong Space Station
“We don't know who
these guys are,” says astronaut
before communicaction is cut off. |
|
UN Welcomes Coca Republic
as New Member State
Will pay dues in small
bills. |
| |
| BUSINESS |
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Sun Purchased by Moon
Computer giant now part of
Unification Church. |
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| MISCELLANEOUS |
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RUSSIA,
NEEDING CASH, WILL
ANIMATE LENIN
He'll wave while singing,
“It's a Small
World.” |
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| U. S. NEWS |
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Missile Defense Shield Will
Bust Budget, Cause New Arms
Race, Won't Work
But no other problems
expected. |
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Rich Say They Need Bush Tax Cut
Point to high price of diamonds,
yachts, caviar. |
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Liddy Now Says Watergate
Break-In "Dean's Idea"
Also claims McGovern ordered bombing
of Cambodia. |
|
Insiders Say Laura
Bush “Calls All the
Shots”
First Lady tells President who
to shoot. |
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|
| |
| ENVIRONMENT |
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Government Will Charge Rent in
National Parks to Bears, Elk
“Free ride over” says
Interior Sec. Norton. |
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| LAW |
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Road Rage Was Justified, Says O.J.
“Other guy was
driving way too slow on freeway,” he
claims. |
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