| MISCELLANEOUS |
 |
 KKK
Holds First Public Cross Burning
in 50 Years
Anticipating Republican sweep in
mid-terms. |
|
|
Florida Grabs 4 of 10 Highest
Ranking U.S. Cities for Divorce
After retired couples finally get to
spend time together. |
| |
| EDUCATION |
|
Iran Orders Universities to
Drop Courses Deemed Too
“Western”
Like “History of the Crusades,”
“Socioeconomics of Pole
Dancing” and "Humorous
Depictions of Muhammad in Modern
Literature.” |
| |
| TECHNOLOGY |
 |
|
Humanoid
Robot to Fly on Space Shuttle
Will do jobs humans won't do. |
|
|
China Now Has World's Fastest Supercomputer
To keep track of loans to U.S. |
|
| FEATURE |
 |
| The vast majority of political
ads you've been seeing are paid for by: |
| A ) | the
Democratic and Republican parties |
| B ) | murky
organizations funded by reclusive billionaires, multinational
corporations and foreign governments |
| C ) | the
military rulers of Mars |
| Hint: Unfortunately, you
are not allowed to have this information. Just
watch the ad. |
|
|
|
| |
| TRAVEL |
|
Tourists Canceling Holiday
Trips to New York City Due to Bedbugs
Will have their pockets picked some other
time. |
| |
| SPORTS |
|
 World
Cup Soccer’s Psychic
Octopus Dies
As predicted by Nostradamus. |
|
|
