 PRESIDENT OBAMA
PARDONS TURKEY
Republicans livid at his abuse of executive power. |
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| WORLD NEWS |
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As Holidays Near, World Looks
Prayerfully to Jerusalem
Where residents are celebrating holy
season by starting holy war. |
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Pope to Visit Philadelphia
To attend women’s rights conference, gay marriage rally. |
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| ENVIRONMENT |
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Republicans: We're Not Scientists
Scientists: we're not Republicans. |
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| ALSO IN THE NEWS ... |
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 Hitler Watercolor Sells
at Auction for $162,000
To buyer who wishes to remain anonymous forever. |
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| U. S. NEWS |
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Report on Torture May Go
Unreleased With Democrats
Losing Control of Senate
And with Edward Snowden stuck in Russia. |
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GOP-Controlled House Committee
On Intelligence Report Debunks
Benghazi Allegations
But praises them for making Hillary look bad. |
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| REMINDER |
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Smile, your webcam's been hacked. |
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Report: 67 of 100 Senators Have
Family Members on Payroll
Friends doing well too. |
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NSA Director: Chinese Hackers
Capable of Shutting Down Our
Power Grid
Or, to put it in starker terms, no online
gaming for a few minutes. |
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New Species of Frog Discovered
in New York City
At new French restaurant. |
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