Ironic Times

page one
PAGE THREE – SEPTEMBER 12 - 18, 2011
page two

MISCELLANEOUS
World's First Commercial Spaceport Nears Completion
Richard Branson's venture will serve as a hub for likeminded entrepreneurial billionaires traveling to and from space with young, nubile female companions.
Survey: Boomers’ Kids Can’t
Count on Inheriting

Gen Xers reconsider death panels.
 
EDUCATION
Textbooks Replaced by iPads on Many College Campuses
Ornithology replaced by Angry Birds.
 
SPORTS
College, Pro Football Seasons Begin
Pros have new contract, student-athletes have new cars, hookers.
 
KIDZ KORNER
Vocabulary Builders
chutzpah n., when the Governor of Texas cuts funding 75% for volunteer fire departments, then demands federal disaster relief to fight wildfires, while calling for cuts in government spending.
FEATURE
What is it exactly that Republicans in Congress so disliked about
Obama’s speech to the joint session on jobs?
A )he wanted the government to do something about jobs.
B )he wanted the government to do something
C )he wanted something.
D )he’s still president.
E )he’s still Obama.
Hint: and he is still a Democrat.
 
TECHNOLOGY
.xxx Domain Opens for Business
Now you can find all your bestiality videos in one place.
 
ODDS 'N' ENDS
Electric Motor Made From Single Molecule
Promises future micro-machines so small as to be utterly useless.

FRONT PAGE
PAGE TWO
PAGE THREE
ARCHIVE
CONTACT
STORE
   Copyright 2011 Ironic Times