| PENTAGON: CHINA
DEVELOPING STEALTH FIGHTER JUST
LIKE OURS |
 Wants to
borrow from China
to make ours better. |
|
| |
| WORLD NEWS |
 |
Lindsey Graham Suggests
U.S. Keep Two Permanent
Bases in Afghanistan
To protect small minority who want us to
stay there from huge majority who want us
to leave. |
|
Romania Declares Witchcraft
Legal Profession
Practitioners dealing in fraudulent
spells risk decertification. |
| |
| ALSO IN THE NEWS . . . |
|
 New
Congress Gets Off to Amicable Start
Only glitch: incoming Speaker's
tears bond with outgoing
Speaker's makeup. |
|
|
| U. S. NEWS |
|
Obama to Deliver State of the
Union Address on Jan. 25
Immediately following, GOP will deliver
State of the Confederacy address. |
|
Navy Relieves Captain of Duty
for Performing in Raunchy Videos
Search begins to find replacement who has
never performed in raunchy videos. |
| |
| REMINDER |
| |
Be
nice to people on the way
up, because they'll be
training your replacement
in Mumbai on the way
down. |
|
|
|
| |
|
Bad News: Petraeus Spent
$1 Million in 2008 on Iraqi
Water Park Now in Ruins
Good news: he’s building new one in
Afghanistan. |
| |
| POLITICS |
|
GOP Congresswoman Michele
Bachmann Considering White
House Bid
Further splintering party's nitwit-
nutcake wing. |
|
