OPERATION ODYSSEY DAWN BEGINS
Based on the motion picture of the same name. |
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| WORLD NEWS |
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The United States Warns U.S. Citizens
Against Travel to Libya
Suggests armed insurrection, government's
bloody reprisals, U.S. stealth bombers,
Tomahawk missile attacks could mar
vacation plans. |
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Prince Andrew Demoted From
Post as Trade Ambassador
Change in policy calls for fewer exported
scandals. |
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| PUBLISHING |
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Al
Qaeda Launches Women's Magazine
Aimed at today's obedient woman. |
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| U. S. NEWS |
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Clinton Tells Iran to Stop Meddling in
Bahrain and Other Arab States
“If there's any meddling to be done,
it will be done by us.” |
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Four in Ten American Millionaires
Say They Don't Feel Rich
When asked for money. |
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| REMINDER |
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It's
too soon to make jokes
about Gilbert Gottfried. |
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NRA Declines Invitation to
Meet With Obama
He'd asked they come unarmed. |
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Texas Group Providing College
Scholarships for White Males
Same group that provides free medical
care to the rich. |
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| ALSO IN THE NEWS . . . |
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Good News: 70,000-Member
Internet Pedophile Ring Broken Up
Bad news: SEVENTY THOUSAND! |
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